UPDATE

So it has been a while since the last time I wrote down my thoughts but many things have happened in the past 13 days that have been mind consuming.
After twisting my ankle and not being able to run for 10 days, I finally was able for the first time in my life to run for more than 30 minutes (3 miles) straight...it felt great!! This running schedule that I've been following was fantastic and now I am looking for running schedules to reach 6 miles. I am hoping reaching 6 miles will only take another 5 to 6 weeks but hopefully not more if I still want to reach 8 miles by December 31st. The 5K race that I was originally going to participate in and was the original set date to reach 3 miles is in the end of August but I still don't know if I'll be able to participate since there is a big possibility that I will be away for that weekend. There is also a 10K race in the beginning of November that will be the set date to reaching more than 6 miles running. While following the running schedule it was easier not to have a running partner because of the structure of the schedule in which one runs for a set time and then walk but now that I am running for 30 minutes straight I am finding myself searching for running partners that will do the same. It makes the run more interesting and more challenging and forces me to push beyond the set goal. But another challenge is being my own motivator and this running schedule has helped be become one.
Anyways running is not the only thing that I feel like I've made advances in. The other day one of friends left the music playing as we were leaving her house; she is a big animal lover. Now in high school if we had voting for nicknames I would've definitely gotten "Most Opinionated". I had set opinions and held on to them and basically wasn't very open to other views, especially when it came to intangible, spiritual or not very scientific ideas. However, as we were leaving her house I asked her if she was leaving the music on for her animals. I didn't even notice that there might've been something weird with what I said until she pointed it out but still even if she said yes my reaction would've been the same. I think having her as a friend although might not have changed a lot of my believes or opinions about things it certainly have helped me open up to different views and be respectful of them regardless of how much I might disagree with them.
I think I've become more open with people; I kind of stopped trying to be mysterious except with the ones that ask for it. I met someone the other night and we had a wonderful conversation, he reminded me of someone and that usually would've been the end of it but not this time. I really would like to get to know him better and work on these projects with him next semester.
In the past 13 days I've also been betrayed by a best friend and I think that is the reason why I avoided writing anything in the past 13 days because I promised him that I will forget about what happened and turn a new leaf with him and writing about it when the wound was still open would've kept it engraved in my memory and I would've never been able to move past it. Quite honestly I don't know why I decided to forgive him. I mean I do believe that he didn't intentionally do it just to hurt but that he did it because he was thinking about himself at that moment and nobody else. But I think the main reason why I forgave him is not that I think he didn't mean it but knowing that he doesn't have the power to hurt me. I don't know if this makes sense... but a friend's betrayal/loss has as much weight as a person gives it. Ironically, right after this happened I decided to hang out with another friend who also betrayed me a while back but truly hurt me and affected the way that I dealt with people from then on that I stopped letting anyone close because I didn't trust people anymore. However, it feels shitty when you feel betrayed but it feels good when you rid yourself of anger.
I’ve been looking for apartments with my future roommates. We haven’t found anything yet but I am getting a little excited and nervous at the same time. Moving in with best friend will either take your friendship to yet another level or break it but I think the most important thing to focus on is being honest with each other and tackle problems in a mature way. I am not that worried about this part but what worries me is that I could see our apartment having 3 permanent guests there all the time and that scares me…not to mention that one of those guests might me my own brother. Don’t get me wrong I love my brother, I love hanging out with him but there are also certain limitations that accompany having him around and I would like to get to miss him sometimes. However, he has become very good friends with two of my future roommates and the third one has a crush on him…so this situation seems to be unavoidable…oh well I guess it could be worse!